On My Own

As the saying goes, "When the going gets tough, the tough get going." This is a proactive approach when dealing with struggles and hardships; however, how many of us live by this? Truth be told, my saying would actually go something like this: "When the going gets tough, hide under a blanket and avoid people." Please tell me I'm not the only one that does this. I realize it's not mature or responsible of me, but I'd like to think the problems will just evaporate into thin air as I tuck my head into my down feather pillow.

I've been learning the hard way about a few struggles in my life. I won't go into detail, but I am finally recognizing the importance of asking for help and proactively changing aspects of my life. Changes are occurring by the second. Some we can control, while others are far out of our reach. Some are taking place within, and others we must learn to seek assistance from others in order to cope and become better.

Asking for help. Why is this such a difficult concept for me to grasp? It takes a lot of strength to ask for help, but for some reason I continue to view it as a weakness. Sometimes my hands are tied together and I still try to unwrap them on my own. I find myself looking more foolish and ridiculous tackling tasks that are too big for me. Some day I will learn that I am not only my own. In fact, I have a lot of people in my life that are on my side.

What to Wear

Not too long ago, one of my students asked, "Is your second job shopping? Because you never wear the same clothes twice." This may sound pathetic, but the comment actually made my day. Maybe it wasn't even meant to be a compliment, but I surely took it as one. For the record (Mom), I have worn my outfits more than once.

Days later, I was having a conversation with one of my classes about how I generally plan out Sunday night what I will wear each day of the following week. Crazy? Perhaps, but I just like to know what clothes need to be clean and when. Obviously, I change my mind all of the time. It's not like I write it out in my planner. I just find comfort knowing all of my ducks are in a row.

In high school, many of my friends and I would plan to wear "sweats" on Wednesdays. I use that term loosely because we were all showered with hair and makeup in place. Most of the time we wore yoga pants and cute sweatshirts, so we hardly looked "dressed down." Of course, Fridays were set aside for "Friday outfits." For some reason we wanted to look the best at the end of the week. Dressing to impress the same kids we saw every other day of the week may have been silly, but our moods were boosted as we sported those "Friday outfits."

This afternoon I texted one of my friends asking if it was time to start thinking about the weekend. I mean, it is almost Wednesday. After making tentative plans with a few friends, I ran across an article on MSN about how women have their Saturday night outfits planned by Wednesday afternoon. I about died... how funny! Apparently I'm not the only person out their thoughtfully considering what I'll slip into this weekend... even if it is lounge wear for a movie night.

I realize by writing this I seem a tad shallow, and maybe even pathetic, but I don't really care. The fact is, I'm not alone. Will you at least just humor me into thinking I'm not alone on this issue?

I bet y'all are thinking about what you are wearing to work tomorrow right now ;-)

Contentment

Often I find myself searching for inspiration. I feel uneasy, so I start reading articles or books that may have some sort of an "answer" for those unsettling feelings. There are times that I fall short. Other times I find that "nugget" that pulls me away from a rotten feeling. Tonight, as I bounced around online, I came across "4 Ways to Have Contentment." Boy, was I in need of these comforting words.

Here are some of my thoughts:

1. We can have contentment by trusting that God will provide whatever is necessary. The word "trust" continues to pop up as I study, read, listen... it is all over. The article mentions that there are over 6,000 promises in the Bible that are ours to claim. So, why do we habitually try to take our lives into our own hands? We push God away. This is silly because He is the only one that knows what is necessary in our lives. Trust Him.

2. We can have contentment by shifting our emphasis to what God has given us rather than what we lack. Just has Adam and Eve were tempted by the tree of knowledge of good and evil, we continue to want what we don't have. We focus on what we lack, rather than trusting that God has given us exactly what we need at this point in our lives.

3. We can have contentment by acknowledging the face that we deserve much less than what God has already given us. I am so fortunate. I have been blessed with more than I will ever deserve. I continue to sin, yet I have been given family, friends, a job, a home with clean water. This is only the beginning of the uncountable blessings given to me by Him.

4. We have contentment by believing that what God has withheld is actually no good. Sometimes unanswered prayers are hard to wrap our human minds around; however, His plan is much greater than anything we can imagine.

Together As One

I was in bed long before the announcement of Obama winning the latest election. It was kind of strange because I had a very restless night of sleep. I may have actually been checking my phone in my sleep to see the results. Then, of course, there was a text from my sister, "OBAMA!" I have to say, I'm quite relieved. There was a little bit more unrest and uncertainty for the field of education with Mitt Romney. This morning, I watched Obama's speech. I got goosebumps and shed a few tears (What? I'm a softy). America is really an amazing nation.

Facebook and Twitter were dominated by people's political views over the past few days. It was starting to get a little overwhelming, but it made me start to think about what the next four years has in store. If people are so divided during an election, will they be able to come together to make the nation the best it can be? I truly believe that doing so is also a part of our duty as Americans. Being kind and respectful is more important than sharing our opinions. I hope we call all come together as one and realize that each voice not only counts, but it matters.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

I've always been a lover of movies. Whether it's going to a Sunday matinee or renting from Redbox, I enjoy immersing myself in the lives of characters. I've caught some slack for going to movies by myself, but for some reason I find great joy in being alone as I sip on a fountain pop in the often chilly theatre seats.

Since I had last Friday off, I decided to catch a matinee before hanging out with some friends. As I scrolled through the movie options, The Perks of Being a Wallflower was my first choice. It is based on the book written by Stephen Chosky. While many movies don't live up to the book, I was impressed with the actors and the overall depiction of the story. I had forgotten about all of the great lines that surface while reading the novel. I was so glad that I went and was able to refresh my memory...

If only for a moment...

Life is always moving... hold on.

So true.

I want to watch it again. So good.

Flexibility

I was reminded today of the importance of flexibility. I'm not talking about the slightly awkward stretches in pilates; however, who doesn't love turning into a pretzel?

No, I am talking about the ability to go with the flow and adapt according to the situation at hand. After a solid nine hours of sleep Sunday night, I was ready to tackle the week. Before leaving school last week, I was sure to have this week's lesson plans set so I would be free of homework. By the time second period rolled around, I realized that the story I was teaching was no where to be found. Sure enough, I had overlooked the note that said, "Print pdf and copy." Whoopsie daisy. As I went to print, the printer was "busy." Whatever that means. At any rate, my lesson plans were shot.

After joking with my students about how I had just wasted 46 minutes of their lives, they assured me that it was okay (of course... they were about to gossip about the events of the weekend... shysters). In a last-ditch effort, I had the kids do a quick writing including a "butterfly effect" (I swear this is relevant in my lesson). It wasn't the most effective assignment, but at least I can say they did something... well, kinda.

As I drove home today, I started thinking about the notion of flexibility. I was reminded of my time in Haiti. It was more than necessary to be flexible the days we were without water or as the tentative schedule happened to change. Making plans is important, but adjusting is vital. Over plan and go with the flow. This has become the story of my life as a teacher.

"It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. 

It is the one that is most adaptable the change." - Charles Darwin

Sundays

First of all, I'm alive. I feel off the map for a while, mostly because I wasn't feeling creative or real motivated to write. I realize much of my "life material" has been lacking. My days consist of teaching, which spills into many of my evenings. I have been doing a pretty good job of getting my work done at school so I can rest and relax at night; however, as I've mentioned before, my mind stays on school most of the time. With that said, as much as I want to write about the issues that arise while teaching, I know that it's not always professional to do so. I am really hoping my creative juices perk up because I miss writing.

As for today, I am lounging around and enjoying the last hours of the weekend. I was talking to a friend about Sundays. I definitely have a love/hate relationship with this day of the week. I realize it is supposed to be the day of rest. For me, I have fallen into the routine of attending church, followed by grocery shopping and a movie. I love running errands and getting myself prepared for the week, but sometime around mid-afternoon I start to feel uneasy. It may be because I begin to feel anxious about the upcoming week. I used to spend Sundays with friends and family. While I have the option of doing that now, I often find myself alone on Sundays. Sometimes it's nice to not answer my phone and submerge myself in the thoughts floating in my brain, but that often leaves me worrisome and anxious. I just need to find a balance where I feel okay with myself.

I will admit that I am perfectly content being alone today. I am not interested in talking to anyone. I will get around to taking the trash out when I feel like it. I have no issue wearing sweats and slipping on my glasses as I sink into my couch for another Lifetime movie.

My thoughts exactly today.

I'm gearing up for another week. It's hard to believe that Thanksgiving is only a few weeks away. I'm getting excited to spend some time with my family! Take care.