Regret

People say you shouldn't regret things; you should accept and learn from them. While I do agree that acceptance is important, I can't say I don't have any regrets. If fact, I have many. We don't always make the right decisions. There are times we hold onto things that are better let go. Often we hurt others in selfishness. We get lost down destructive paths and often feel stuck. The good part is, it seems we always make it out. We may have learned from the past; however, that doesn't mean we don't wish we would have chosen something different for ourselves.

I read an article on the "Marc and Angel Hack Life" blog titled "10 Choices You Will Regret in 10 Years." As I read, I had those "if I knew then what I know now" moments. Here's a few of them highlighted:

1. Wearing a mask to impress others. Who hasn't done this? The desire to fit in is overwhelming. We want others to like us, so we do what pleases them. In turn, we lose sight of what makes ourselves happy.

3. Keeping negative company. We have all been around those people that have nothing good to say. They complain, complain, complain. Negativity is so contagious, and it is nothing that I want to be known for; therefore, I strategically find people that lift me up. Attitude makes all the difference in the world.

5. Avoiding change and growth. Yes, these can be scary. The beginning of change is hard, but as soon as it all starts to sink in, there is nothing better than feeling a sense of accomplishment. There comes a time when you can look back and be proud of how far you have come.

7. Trying to micromanage everything. You only can control what you do. There is no sense fretting about anything else. Period.

8. Settling for less than what you deserve. Why do we settle for contentment, for what is easy? Set your standards high.

9. Endlessly waiting for tomorrow. Life is meant to be lived in the present.

10. Being lazy and wish-washy. Take control of your life. Make decisions. Be proactive, and give back.

Life is good :-)

Takes Me Back

Last night, my school's girls basketball team put up a good fight. Despite their best efforts, they fell short of a win in the sub-state game. I sat in the stands, cheering, whispering silent prayers, and smiling as I soaked in the atmosphere. I was taken back to my last basketball game played in high school.

I love basketball. There is no doubting that my heart has always had a soft spot for the sport. I pride myself on having knowledge and skill (maybe not WNBA skill, but I've got it). I am the fan that moves around in the bleachers while shouting, "Get your hands up on D!" I know all the cheers, and I'm not afraid to stand up and chant right along. It's one of the most comforting environments; it makes me feel at home.

My senior year, my team made it to the sub-state game. We played our hearts out. The team was just unstoppable. They were putting up shots that we had a hard time defending. I remember the goosebumps running up and down my arms. I remember the smell of the locker room, the taste of the tears that fell as the game came to a close. Most of all, I remember walking into my kitchen at the end of the night. I found my parents, with open arms, waiting to congratulate me on a good season. Mom said, "You're done!" I looked at her, tearing streaming down my face, and replied, "I wasn't ready to be done." They embraced me, and my dad assured me that it was my best game of my high school career.

He wasn't wrong. I left my heart on the court that night, as I'm sure many of my students did last night. The memories will last forever for them, just as they have for me.

Just Had to Blog

Sometimes I leave school thinking, "Why do I do this?" I know that I take my work home with me; the lives of my kids weigh heavy on my heart. What are my students going home to? Have I impacted them at all today? Was my lesson effective? I often believe that I am learning much more from them than they are from me. 

I've talked to my best friend about those "good teaching days." These are the days were productivity, rich discussions, and "teachable moments" occupy my eight period day. The only problem is, they don't happen nearly enough. I realize that I am a first year teacher. In the words of my dad, "Your first year is your worst teaching." It can only go up from here. 

This past week was very encouraging. While I did have more frustrations that not, I felt confident and comfortable. I shared conversations with colleagues that proved that I am surrounded by some of the best. I heard the words, "This is a great place for you to start." No school is perfect; however, my school is perfect for me right now. I am learning, teaching, and bettering myself each day. 

Last night, I had "one of those moments." I was right where I needed to be. It was the kind of moment where you smile and get goosebumps running up and down your arms. My school's girls basketball team has had a very successful season. Last night, they won to advance to regionals (one more step closer to the state tournament). I sat there with my parents, whom I was blessed to have accompany me, and soaked in each moment. The girls and there teamwork, the parents and teachers shouting along with the crowd, and, best of all, the student section. They were awesome - all dressed in black for the "Blackout." They chanted and stood proudly on their feet the entire game. It reminded me of the moment when I realized I was being called to be a teacher. A few years ago, I sat at a high school basketball game, knowing that the school environment was where I belonged. Here I am, living my dream. I couldn't be more proud of my students, my school, and... myself.