Lessons in Listening

I've always thought of myself as a good listener. I try to make it a priority to listen to others, but it wasn't until recently that I started to think about why I listen. Do I listen to understand? Do I listen so I can make connections? Do I listen so I can add my input? Or maybe better questions to ask myself are: Why should I listen? Why is it so important?

Too often I find myself listening only to add comments to the person talking. We've all done it. We wait for them to finish up so we can insert our own thoughts -- some of which may not even be about the other person. Sometimes we turn the focus back on ourselves. This isn't all bad. I think it's important to make personal connections in order to fully understand.

When listening, it's important to distinguish what the other person hopes from a listener. Sometimes it's good to just vent. We want to have a little pity party, and we don't want any lectures about it. Other times, we are seeking advice. We want to know the other person's input. Both of these scenarios are necessary.

When I took classes for my Communication degree, I remember being intrigued by the lack of communication that all of us have. Whether it was in a business setting or with a group of friends, communication can be difficult. We struggle to share our real feelings. We put a guard up in hopes of not hurting others. Sometimes we are merely forgetful which causes communication issues. Whatever the case may be, it doesn't deter from the fact that communicating with others is not only imperative, it's inevitable. It always makes me laugh when people say they don't want to be in a career where they "deal with people." Well, good luck because that career is essentially non-existant. We interact with others every day; therefore, communicating and listening are two critical tools to living.

Closing a (Long) Chapter

This year both of my parents decided it was time to retire from years of teaching. As the school year progressed, it was easy to tell it was time. Don't get me wrong, they didn't get crabby or negative, but they just seemed a little bit more "ready." I'm excited for both of them as they begin this next chapter in their lives (sorry for the cliche).

It's fun listening to their stories of how they began, the transitions they've made, and the student lives they've touched. We've had many "teacher talks" swapping stories about kids, discussing lesson plans, and comparing differences in the education systems. All of which has been very rewarding for all of us.

Some of my favorite conversations with my parents have been about their students. The stories that they (mostly my dad -- he's very good at story-telling) tell are sometimes laugh-out-loud funny while others could move you to tears. All of these stories are written in the books of their teaching careers.

Here are some "nuggets" I've learned from them in regards to teaching:

1. "Kids are kids." This is Dad's signature line, and the truth is, he's so right. It doesn't matter where they came from, what their life story is, or what they look like, deep down, kids are kids. They all want and need the same thing, which leads me to #2.

2. "Care for all the kids." This would be Mom's signature line. She is an advocate for loving the snot out of those kids (even when there is snot running down their noses). The bottom line is that kids want to be loved; they want to be listened to and respected. Some of them only get this at school, making it the most important part of a teacher's job.

3. "One day (class period) at a time." I'm not sure where this one comes from, but it has a lot of value. It's easy to fret about lessons for next week and worry about after-school obligations, but that will all take care of itself. Take time with each student, each class period, each day. They deserve your attention, especially if you expect it from them.

4. "Slow down and listen." This is my dad's personality to a T. He doesn't rush, and he always listens. However, my mom runs on a different speed, sometimes working herself up about unnecessary things. But, when it comes to the classroom, she knows when to slow down. In fact, they both do. If a student doesn't get it, Mom stops, slows down, and ensure he or she does. Dad listens to each kid or person that comes in his door. Slowing down and listening are so important in the teaching profession. It's one more way to put a child's interest before our own.

I'm not sure what my parents will do with their free time, but I'm sure they'll figure it out. I'm very proud of them as they close this seemingly long chapter of their lives. They are both wonderful teachers to look up to. Thanks to you both!

It All Comes Full Circle

When I woke up today, it felt like summer. I didn't sleep well because I had a lot of things on my mind, but I realized in my restlessness that it didn't really matter. Realistically, I can nap all day. Jealous? Don't worry; I'll be bored by Thursday.

One of the things on my mind is our upcoming 10 year class reunion (which I am in charge of). It really won't be a huge hassle, but I want to make sure it's done right. As I pondered the details, I couldn't help but think how things come full circle. Two weekends ago, I was watching my senior students walk across their stage. I am so proud of them, and it is one of the neatest parts of being a teacher. I thought back to my HS graduation. Did my teachers feel the same way? I'm pretty certain they did, and now I get it. I am a part of those teachers that help transform students. I get to leave imprints on students, just as my teachers did for me.

Another item on my to-do list is my living arrangements for next year. This summer is going to be filled with transitions, and if you know anything about me, I'm not a fan of this. I like schedules and knowing what's next, but that's not what life is all about. I am going to be moving to a new area, teaching at a new school, and finding a new normal. Part of me Most of me is very excited about this, while another part is slightly anxious. I know these are all "normal" feelings, but they are still pretty evident.

The day I left my old school, I mailed the signed contract back to my new school. Once again, it all comes full circle. Life is about changes, and that is the best part!

P.S. Why is it humid already? Oh, Iowa, how I did miss your summers.

New Beginnings

Yesterday was my last day teaching at my current district. To be honest, it was much more difficult than I had expected. It was filled with kind words, many hugs, and a few tears. As I drove away in my car for the last time, I felt appreciated and touched by all of those that I left behind.

Last night I was beyond exhausted. I also felt a little lost (probably because I was so tired). I started to wonder about how I was going to fill my time this summer and what goals I wanted to set for myself. All the while, my mind kept bouncing back to my students. I really will miss them a great deal.

After a pretty good night's sleep, I made my way to the gym for a sweaty workout. I just finished up getting my nails and hair done. (I'm spoiling myself.) As always, my hair stylist and I chatted away. As she finished up giving me a new look, she said, "New hair for new beginnings!" I couldn't have said it better myself. This summer is going to be full of new beginnings. For some reason I woke up with a new outlook on things. I'm still feeling a little tired, so I plan on resting this weekend.

This post is a little disorganized, but I really didn't know where I wanted to go with it. All I can say right now is, here's to new beginnings!

Last Day Eve

I'm sitting in my classroom on eve of the last day of school. Not only is it the last day of school for the year, but it is my last day at my current district. I have everything packed up, which I was reluctant to do, mostly because I didn't want the kids to think I wanted to scoot out the door as soon as possible. The truth is, I am going to miss them the most. I have spent the past two years getting to know them, and we are comfortable with one another. They can sense all the changes, and it's going to take some adjusting to next year. But, life is about change.

I'm not sure how tomorrow will go. I'm sure it will be a mixture of emotions, but overall, it will be bittersweet. Bitter because I will be leaving people that I care about. Sweet because I'm really looking forward to the future. I definitely have the sense that it is time to move on.

As I embrace the last day, I want to take in each class period. I want to soak it all in -- every conversation, every laugh, every memory. This school will always be very special to me.

Nearing the End

Congratulations Class of 2014! As I drove home after the ceremony, I couldn't help but smile when I thought about the kids. The seniors this year were enjoyable for many reasons. Their personalities were vibrant and contagious. While they did test my limits, I looked forward to seeing them each day.

The ceremony itself was perfect. It was the right mixture of tears and laughter. I couldn't be more proud of the kids. I am excited for them as they begin the next part of their journeys.

It started to hit me that this is my last week at my first school. It's been a crazy couple of years full of learning, stress, and laughter. I've grown so much as a teacher and person. Many times I think I learned more from my students than they did from me. With that said, I am ready to move on; there are things that I won't miss. But, there are some things that I will miss. Mostly, I will miss the kids. We have built great relationships -- we've shared stories, learned about each other. My only conclusion is that they are wonderful teenagers that will soon develop into young adults. I am excited for all of them, and I truly hope they stay in touch. 

I started to really think about my growth, and I can honestly say that I am proud of myself. There were times when it was tough. There were sleepless nights, stressful class periods, ornery teenagers, and days when I questioned what I was doing. But for the most part, I have thoroughly enjoyed my time at this school. It's been a time for me to gain confidence in the classroom. I'm no longer scared of teenagers... well, for the most part ;-) More than anything, I learned how important it is to care for others. I've learned how listening to kids makes the biggest difference. When it comes down to it, we all just want to be loved. That's what I did... everyday. I loved and cared for these kids (even when it was hard to), and I will continue to do that. Next year, I will have a whole new group of kids to care about, but I will always have a very special place in my heart for this school. 

We are nearing the end; this week is my last week. I'm not really even sure how I feel at this point. I am just going to take each day as it comes. I am going to love and enjoy each moment.

A Happy Age

The other day I was sitting around with a couple of seniors. We were just chatting about college, the future, and the expectations that they have. I remember being in that same boat and dreaming about all that the future held. One kid said to me, "I think I'll be okay at college." I probably looked at him funny because my only thought was, "Of course you will." I explained to him and the others that high school is not the best time of your life. It's all a part of the journey.

On one of my commutes to school this week, I was listening to talk radio. The people were talking about age and "figuring out" life. Someone shared that their best age has been 50. Everyone thinks that their 20s are the time of your life, but it's also a very messy time. I find that to be true. Yes, I'm young. I am in a selfish stage as I continue to work on the kinks. The funny thing is, as soon as I have one thing figured out, something else seems to be blocking me from happiness. For me, this is a confusing time. I'm striving to figure things out. Until then, I'm just living one day at a time.