Lunch Lady Land

Today I revisited a scary place… the lunchroom. That’s right, this girl snagged a tray and ventured to the land of burritos and taco “meat.” Now, don’t get too worked up. It just so happens that my school has a nice little salad bar. I was able to pile up veggies and pair them will a couple of slices of watermelon. It was pretty filling and tasty enough to fulfill my appetite.

As I marched through the line, I couldn’t help but think of my school lunch experiences growing up. School lunches are hard to forget, especially the more unusual foods.

Have you ever wondered about the guidelines for school menus? For instance, why is chili always served with an ooy gooy cinnamon roll? And what in the world is a “shrimp popper?” My school growing up always placed a PB sandwich along side a slice of greasy pizza. Can you say carb overload? And we always had “bunny food” as the vegetable. A pretty perfect name for carrots and celery, assuming no kid did more than nibble on them.

But the most unforgettable was the Chili Crispito. Processed “meat” paired with gobs of cheese in a fatty tortilla shell. What were we thinking? I mean, we actually ate this. And so many other kids went up for seconds. Barf!

For the most part, my experiences in lunch lady land have left me without an appetite for dinner.